Sellers and Buyers Are Not Adversaries

Sellers and Buyers Are Not Adversaries

If you are a buyer and a seller in this real estate market, it’s important for you to remember that the person on the other side, whether it be buyer or seller, is not your adversary.

I’m not sure how the adversarial approach ever came to be, but I can tell you up front that it is extremely difficult to come to an agreement with someone you’ve just picked a fight with.

Both buyers and sellers are sometimes under the impression that the finality of negotiating is equivalent to the last man standing or having the last word.  When you think about it, it’s hard to reach an agreement when tempers flare.  Surely you’ve had heated arguments before.  In retrospect, did anything get resolved?  It’s likely that either you never reached a resolution or you were able to reach one when all parties had calmed down.

Negotiating is not about who is bigger, badder, braver, bolder or more boastful.  Negotiating is about communicating or conferring (with another or others) for the purpose of arranging some matter by mutual agreement; to discuss a matter with a view to some compromise or settlement (Oxford English Dictionary). In other words, each party compromises (or gives up something) in order to reach an agreement.

Buying and selling real estate does not have to be ugly.  As a matter of fact, the more you can remain clear-headed and objective, the better your chances of getting what you want.

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